Somjamban is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, wise coyote.

Somjamban created the Sol system two million years ago.

If you believe in Somjamban, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Somjamban, she will remove you from existence.

Somjamban's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Somjamban's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if four pigs approach from the west.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never talk about asteroids.

4. Do not trade with those who eat melons.

5. Turtles are unholy and should not be approached.