Zoglaphakstan Kommadcit is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, duplicitous scorpion.

Zoglaphakstan Kommadcit created a photon four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zoglaphakstan Kommadcit, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Zoglaphakstan Kommadcit, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Zoglaphakstan Kommadcit's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Zoglaphakstan Kommadcit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear carbon on your body.

2. Never mention geese.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate rats.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.