Gepjipdub is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, uncaring tapir.

Gepjipdub created oxygen six billion years ago.

If you believe in Gepjipdub, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Gepjipdub, she will turn you into a snail.

Gepjipdub's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Gepjipdub's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Gepjipdub on top of all buildings.

2. Always treat great tits with great respect.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.