Vidgignakwignilstik is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, confident dog.

Vidgignakwignilstik created gold nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vidgignakwignilstik, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Vidgignakwignilstik, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Vidgignakwignilstik's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Vidgignakwignilstik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear silicon on your body.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never go into blue rooms.

4. You must never eat grapes.

5. Always look after injured mites.