Niljarnfed is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, stupid clam.

Niljarnfed created parasitic wasps three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Niljarnfed, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Niljarnfed, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Niljarnfed's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Niljarnfed's Holy Commandments

1. Put Niljarnfed first in all things.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate shrews.