Yimtimlab is a god.
She takes the form of a fat, ill-tempered
yak.
Yimtimlab created the world four thousand years ago.
If you believe in
Yimtimlab, she will visit you to thank you.
If you do not believe in
Yimtimlab, she will destroy your favourite planet.
Yimtimlab's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.
Yimtimlab's Holy Commandments1. Do not wear gold on your body.
2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.
3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate eagles.
4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Yimtimlab.
5. Do not drink alcohol.