Babkemshavdubcin Battofbossappcap is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, compassionate cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Babkemshavdubcin Battofbossappcap created humankind four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Babkemshavdubcin Battofbossappcap, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Babkemshavdubcin Battofbossappcap, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Babkemshavdubcin Battofbossappcap's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Babkemshavdubcin Battofbossappcap's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moons.

2. Never hurt doves.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Never eat bark.