Yakyattgig is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, ill-tempered alligator.

Yakyattgig created Mount Everest four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yakyattgig, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Yakyattgig, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Yakyattgig's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Yakyattgig's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing near snails.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Always treat doves with great respect.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Put Yakyattgig first in all things.