Sandyokflowatteenlatcusstip is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, grumpy narwhal.

Sandyokflowatteenlatcusstip created life four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sandyokflowatteenlatcusstip, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Sandyokflowatteenlatcusstip, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Sandyokflowatteenlatcusstip's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Sandyokflowatteenlatcusstip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Sandyokflowatteenlatcusstip.

5. Always help sick snakes.