Goffarnhakgabpigraklag is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, humane alligator.

Goffarnhakgabpigraklag created bats five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Goffarnhakgabpigraklag, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Goffarnhakgabpigraklag, it will turn you into a plant.

Goffarnhakgabpigraklag's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Goffarnhakgabpigraklag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Never think ill of sick dogs.