Bapflagveen is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, blissful rhinoceros.

Bapflagveen created energy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Bapflagveen, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Bapflagveen, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Bapflagveen's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Bapflagveen's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at stars.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Always make sure there are no sheep in a building before entering it.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.