Fotragmut is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, annoying beaver.

Fotragmut created the Milkyway four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fotragmut, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fotragmut, it will refuse to believe in you.

Fotragmut's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Fotragmut's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed peas to dogs while wearing orange kilts.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never eat melons.

5. Run away if seven tapirs approach from the east.