Boparnvan Omtbosswip is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, egotistical coyote.

Boparnvan Omtbosswip created the planet Jupiter two billion years ago.

If you believe in Boparnvan Omtbosswip, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Boparnvan Omtbosswip, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Boparnvan Omtbosswip's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Boparnvan Omtbosswip's Holy Commandments

1. Dogs are not to be trusted.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never talk about gravity.