Nurllargsan is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, sage turtle.

Nurllargsan created carbon eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurllargsan, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Nurllargsan, he will turn you into a tree.

Nurllargsan's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Nurllargsan's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never jump in holy places.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Always make sure there are no sheep in a building before entering it.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.