Pasnatstan is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, benevolent beaver.

Pasnatstan created the planet Mars seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pasnatstan, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Pasnatstan, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Pasnatstan's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Pasnatstan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Always look after injured snakes.

3. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

4. Never write about gravity.

5. Do not run in public.