Bumcimquaf is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, sage hedgehog.

Bumcimquaf created the world two years ago.

If you believe in Bumcimquaf, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Bumcimquaf, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Bumcimquaf's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Bumcimquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if five geese approach from the west.

2. Never eat rice.

3. Bats are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not kill monkeys.

5. Never think about gravity.