Nellfarbug is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, staggering zebra.

Nellfarbug created an up quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nellfarbug, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Nellfarbug, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Nellfarbug's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Nellfarbug's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear red.

2. Never think about moons.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not take Nellfarbug's name in vain.

5. Always take life seriously.