Litpakbin is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, tiresome salamander.

Litpakbin created life six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Litpakbin, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Litpakbin, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Litpakbin's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Litpakbin's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured snails.

2. You must pray to Litpakbin seven times a day.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Hide if three rats approach from the west.

5. Never paint your head cyan.