Dunlatbat is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, omniscient meerkat.

Dunlatbat created everything that exists nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Dunlatbat, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Dunlatbat, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Dunlatbat's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Dunlatbat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Put Dunlatbat first in all things.

4. Do not wear platinum on your body.

5. Never eat green fruit.