Kinnilsidmeg is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, moody tortoise.

Kinnilsidmeg created an electron six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kinnilsidmeg, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Kinnilsidmeg, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Kinnilsidmeg's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Kinnilsidmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. You must never eat rice.

3. Do not eat nuts.

4. Feed all hungry ants.

5. Always help dolphins.