Tailweezod is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, ruthless walrus.

Tailweezod created the Sun six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tailweezod, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tailweezod, she will turn you into a mouse.

Tailweezod's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Tailweezod's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if six turtles approach from the west.

2. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.

3. Never skip in the presence of voles.

4. Do not kill sheep.

5. Do not commit murder.