Bedfag is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, dishonourable sheep.

Bedfag created gold four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bedfag, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bedfag, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Bedfag's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Bedfag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

2. Never feed wheat to whales while wearing fawn coats.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always help dolphins.

5. You must love Bedfag.