Ditquartgad is a god.

She takes the form of a small, astonishing centipede.

Ditquartgad created Mount Everest five billion years ago.

If you believe in Ditquartgad, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Ditquartgad, she will manifest in front of you.

Ditquartgad's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Ditquartgad's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Do not drink water in brown rooms.

5. Do not wear red clothing.