Mattim is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, pitiless dingo.

Mattim created the planet Saturn two billion years ago.

If you believe in Mattim, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Mattim, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Mattim's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Mattim's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at galaxies.

2. Never eat melons.

3. Worship no other gods but Mattim.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.