Tadloopzig is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, self-confident meerkat.

Tadloopzig created water eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tadloopzig, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Tadloopzig, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Tadloopzig's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Tadloopzig's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Tadloopzig.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never write about comets.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate ants.