Kapvedpagbagmaphigtonk is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, impressive rhinoceros.

Kapvedpagbagmaphigtonk created the Tadpole Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kapvedpagbagmaphigtonk, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Kapvedpagbagmaphigtonk, he will turn you into a slug.

Kapvedpagbagmaphigtonk's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Kapvedpagbagmaphigtonk's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Never hurt bats.

3. Never wear scarves.

4. Never talk about ants.

5. Hide if six porpoises approach from the south.