Metgubhot is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, cheerful penguin.

Metgubhot created a top quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Metgubhot, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Metgubhot, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Metgubhot's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Metgubhot's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Metgubhot's priests.

2. Do not drink water in white rooms.

3. Metgubhot loves grasshopers, so they must be honoured.

4. Hide if three shrews approach from the north.

5. Never paint your chest mauve.