Arfraw is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, smart aardvark.

Arfraw created a down quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Arfraw, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Arfraw, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Arfraw's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Arfraw's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Arfraw.

2. Never paint your back fawn.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never hurt great tits.

5. Hide if seven bats approach from the east.