Targbassnad is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, merciless goose.

Targbassnad created a quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Targbassnad, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Targbassnad, she will destroy your home planet.

Targbassnad's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Targbassnad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never talk about grasshopers.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.