Gebquatnat is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, clever hippopotamus.

Gebquatnat created a charm quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gebquatnat, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gebquatnat, she will throw large rocks at you.

Gebquatnat's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Gebquatnat's Holy Commandments

1. Seals are not to be trusted.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Never hurt moths.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never talk about stars.