Sawparkarf is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, slow dragon.

Sawparkarf created the Small Magellanic Cloud two years ago.

If you believe in Sawparkarf, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Sawparkarf, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Sawparkarf's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Sawparkarf's Holy Commandments

1. Never run near dogs.

2. Sawparkarf must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.