Farkarbest is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, cheerful wren.

Farkarbest created a top quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Farkarbest, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Farkarbest, it will try to impress you with trees.

Farkarbest's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Farkarbest's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never talk about turtles.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Erect a large iron sculpture of Farkarbest on top of all buildings.

5. Never bounce in the presence of badgers.