Kemrotfit is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, proud giraffe.

Kemrotfit created dark energy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kemrotfit, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Kemrotfit, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Kemrotfit's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Kemrotfit's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Do not drink water in black rooms.

3. Always make sure there are no goats in a building before entering it.

4. Never talk about foxes.

5. Put Kemrotfit first in all things.