Kikdodpit is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, clever pig.

Kikdodpit created dark matter five billion years ago.

If you believe in Kikdodpit, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Kikdodpit, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Kikdodpit's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Kikdodpit's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured turtles.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Kikdodpit.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.