Taildutpig is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, passionate yak.

Taildutpig created Asia five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Taildutpig, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Taildutpig, it will turn you into a hamster.

Taildutpig's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Taildutpig's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Erect a large silver sculpture of Taildutpig on top of all buildings.

4. Put Taildutpig first in all things.

5. Do not drink alcohol.