Himjiphot Capcarweg is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, moody chicken.

Himjiphot Capcarweg created everything that exists three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Himjiphot Capcarweg, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Himjiphot Capcarweg, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Himjiphot Capcarweg's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Himjiphot Capcarweg's Holy Commandments

1. Never run near horses.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Put Himjiphot Capcarweg first in all things.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Always make sure there are no swans in a building before entering it.