Wadnartyak is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, capable fairy.

Wadnartyak created viruses two billion years ago.

If you believe in Wadnartyak, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Wadnartyak, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Wadnartyak's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Wadnartyak's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always wear orange.

4. Always look after injured great tits.

5. Always take life seriously.