Bafcebcuss is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, vain goblin.

Bafcebcuss created a photon six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bafcebcuss, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bafcebcuss, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Bafcebcuss' most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Bafcebcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Never look at asteroids.

3. Run away from brown porpoises, for they are unholy.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.