Donpombad is a god.

She takes the form of a large, duplicitous hyena.

Donpombad created Asia five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Donpombad, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Donpombad, she will destroy your home solar system.

Donpombad's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Donpombad's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in the presence of aardvarks.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Porpoises are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never feed grapes to ducks while wearing violet shorts.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.