Wikliklarp is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, humorless goblin.

Wikliklarp created the world four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wikliklarp, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Wikliklarp, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Wikliklarp's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Wikliklarp's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Wikliklarp.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

3. Never sit near nematodes.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not trade with those who eat tomatoes.