Dibtonkan is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, deceitful finch.

Dibtonkan created Europe four million years ago.

If you believe in Dibtonkan, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Dibtonkan, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Dibtonkan's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Dibtonkan's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in the presence of badgers.

2. Feed all hungry doves.

3. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.