Jarnbasstimmiddodhabrag is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, witless wren.

Jarnbasstimmiddodhabrag created an atom five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jarnbasstimmiddodhabrag, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Jarnbasstimmiddodhabrag, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Jarnbasstimmiddodhabrag's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Jarnbasstimmiddodhabrag's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never eat peas.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Jarnbasstimmiddodhabrag.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. You must love Jarnbasstimmiddodhabrag.