Yiklabquam is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, all-knowing skunk.

Yiklabquam created Europe eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yiklabquam, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Yiklabquam, he will be very unhappy.

Yiklabquam's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Yiklabquam's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from brown ducks for they are unholy.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never eat parsnips.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Feed all hungry swans.