Yognatsin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, vain faun.

Yognatsin created vertebrates seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yognatsin, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Yognatsin, he will turn you into a mouse.

Yognatsin's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Yognatsin's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Always treat swans with great respect.

3. Do not drink water in green rooms.

4. You must love Yognatsin.

5. Never talk about manatees.