Lunstragwan is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, stupid raven.

Lunstragwan created a strange quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Lunstragwan, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Lunstragwan, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Lunstragwan's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Lunstragwan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

2. Hide from black swans for they are unholy.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not hurt tortoises.