Xenonttin is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, merciful armadillo.

Xenonttin created silver four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xenonttin, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Xenonttin, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Xenonttin's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Xenonttin's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no birds in a building before entering it.

2. Never bounce in holy places.

3. Always help sick whales.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

5. You must pray to Xenonttin nine times a day.