Hugarnxuck is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, able tortoise.

Hugarnxuck created everything that exists eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hugarnxuck, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Hugarnxuck, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Hugarnxuck's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Hugarnxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not wear tin on your body.

3. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Hugarnxuck on top of all buildings.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hugarnxuck.

5. Never go into mauve rooms.