Motloplap is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, grumpy bee.

Motloplap created a charm quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Motloplap, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Motloplap, he will be very unhappy.

Motloplap's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Motloplap's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt great tits.

2. Always wear magenta.

3. Erect seven carbon sculptures of Motloplap on top of important buildings.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Never think about moons.