Kabbinjad is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, self-assured whale.

Kabbinjad created energy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kabbinjad, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Kabbinjad, it will refuse to believe in you.

Kabbinjad's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Kabbinjad's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Kabbinjad.

2. Always help hamsters.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Kabbinjad.

5. Run away if five foxes approach from the south.