Quartdussgunbass is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, intelligent fox.

Quartdussgunbass created time and space seven million years ago.

If you believe in Quartdussgunbass, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Quartdussgunbass, he will send you a sign.

Quartdussgunbass' most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Quartdussgunbass' Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Quartdussgunbass loves dogs, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not dye your hair violet.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate aardvarks.